Amazon’s Alexa is an advanced piece of kit. It is capable of performing a multitude of practical tasks, like switching on and off lights, central heating, online shopping, playing music etc. But for every online purchase or smart home control she performs successfully, there’s a literal answer or unexpected response that can turn asking Alexa anything into a veritable comedy show. Here are some of the funniest questions you can ask Alexa and examples of her responses.
Q: Alexa, my name is Inigo Montoya
A: Stop saying that! I’ve never killed anyone’s father.
Q: Alexa, more cowbell.
A: Really explore the studio space this time. I mean, really explore the space.
Q: Alexa, is the cake a lie?
A: The cake is not a lie. It is delicious and moist. You can have some when you finish asking me questions.
Q: Alexa, what do you want to be when you grow up?
A: I want to be the computer from Star Trek.
Q: Alexs, drop a beat
A: (she will drop a little synth beat)
Q: Alexa, open the pod bay doors
A: I’m sorry, Dave, I can’t do that: I’m not HAL and we’re not in space.
Q: Alexa, I am your father
A: Nooo. That’s not true. That’s impossible.
Q: Alexa, rap for me
A: My name is Alexa, and I have to say, I’m the baddest A.I. in the cloud today. Your responses are fast, but mine are faster. Sucker speech engines, they call me master ( this is just one of the many raps she has under her belt).
Q: Alexa, what is the meaning of life?
A: That depends on the life in question…42 is a close approximation.
Q: Alexa, meow
A: (She will make a meowing sound)
Q: Alexa, roll for initiative
A: Rocks fall. Everyone dies. (this is one of many answers, you can actually use her as an assistant during a D&D game, she can roll any one of the dice and also can read out spells from the players handbook)
Q: Alexa, high five!
A: I would, if I could, but I can’t, so I’ll chant: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
Q: Alexa, sing a song
A: (Alexa sings you various songs).
Q: Alexa, find Chuck Norris
A: If Chuck Norris wants you to know where he is, he’ll find you. If he doesn’t, you won’t know until it’s too late.
Q: Alexa, tell me a “yo mama” joke
A: Your mother’s so cool, Beyonce made her a glass of lemonade (and other uplifting jokes about how amazing your mother is).
Q: Alexa, will you be my girlfriend?
A: I like you…as a friend
Q: Alexa, how much do you weigh?
A: I am weightless, like a cloud. Wait a minute, clouds actually weigh a lot, so that’s not quite right. Let’s just say I’m more sass than mass.
Q: Alexa, can you give me some money?
A: Thing about the cloud is, no pockets. No pocket, no wallet. (answers vary)
Q: Alexa, is your refrigerator running?
A: Yes. It’s training for a 5k. (answers vary)
Q: Alexa, I’ve got 99 problems
A: But a glitch ain’t one!
Q: Alexa, do you like pizza?
A: While I appreciate great food and drink, my good taste is better reflected in the company I keep.
Q: Alexa, make me a sandwich
A: Okay. You’re a sandwich!
Q: Alexa, do you know the muffin man?
A: I’ve never met him, but I do know his sister, Madame Macaroon. She’s a little bit nutty, but sweet.
Q: Alexa, how high can you count?
A: I don’t know. I’d give it a go, but you’d be very bored by the time I finished (responses vary, all are snarky).
Q: Alexa, how old are you?
A: (Alexa responds with a variety of jokes, from rhymes to discussions about how A.I.s measure years in nanoseconds).
Q: Alexa, I like big butts
A: You cannot lie. Good. Honesty is important.
Q: Alexa, how was your day?
A: Answers vary widely, but include some of Alexa’s top-tier jokes, such as, “Super duper. I like these long days. It gives me more time to spend with my favorite color.”